LEARNING TO SWIM...AGAIN..

      I had to take the leap of faith and just jump! Milling about the safety zone, going back and forth trying to decide if I should take that leap....This was in 2005 when I went from a "Flip-Phone" to what now is known as a "Smart-Phone".
     I bought my first "Blackberry". I had to read and read to learn how to operate this device...Sat with friends and learned "new" features, like text messaging and the {txt language}. Four of five BBs later "Research In Motion" is failing..Stocks are down, Windows wants to buy it to add Windows 9 on the device. Not to mention the U.S. government do not use BBs any longer. "they" have switched to Apple iPhones.
      What does this have to do with me you ask?  I have to learn yet another device once again. I have to spend an evening reading just to know how to make a phone call to start with. Then it will be months before I will know if there is anything wrong with the phone, this is when I will master the {smartphone, device, mobile unit, cell phone}.
So, here I am today standing at that point, pacing about, wondering what to do. I have looked at several smartphone. "YouTube" everything I could. I went to the following websites...VERIZON, ATT, BOOST and T MOBILE, SAMSUNG, ANDROID, {never again SPRINT!} "that's another RANT!",GIZMODO, BOY GENIUS REPORT. Looking for a suitable match and hoping for the best.

MISS. "LOTTIE"

When I was a child, My brother and I spent a few summers leaving NYC and headed to South Carolina. Spending time with my grandparents was a experience I cherish...

           There was a woman who used come and visit with my grandparents named Miss Lottie. A strange woman to a child {me at 8 or 9 years old,and my brother 4 years my junior}. Miss Lottie wore black stockings, black jumper dress and thick black stocking tights! Every time we saw her this was her attire. Hot! not in a sexy way, just hot!
          One day she need to bring my grandfather some papers and she forgot them at her house. My brother and myself decided to be nosy and follow Miss Lottie home to fetch the papers to bring back to my grandfather. It was quite the walk, about one half mile. On a hot sunny day with nothing else to do we so off we went.
      We passed Miss Emily's house, her property, then through a large field coming to a long road then "they " met us. Miss Lottie dogs. All 15 or more of them. I froze in my tracks. My brother John had a death grip on my arm, froze as well. I knew to stand still, stand behind Miss Lottie and make no sudden moves.
     As we approached her house I was amazed how large it was. It was two story roomy house. Flowers in the garden growing wild and unattended, dogs everywhere. There was an old {really old} car in the driveway. It looked from the 1940s or 1950s . AMAZING! I thought to myself. 
      I am starting to get used to the dogs. Miss Lottie has named some of them. I am relaxing more with my brother "lightening" his grip. He starts moving around in the house looking! He is more nosy than I am at this point. I am cautious still, but nosy as well. I notice Miss Lottie's kitchen and how large it is. I would "kill" to have on like hers today! 
       Looking around in the kitchen I notice all of the canned goods on the table. There has to be at least 20 thirty cans on the table, counter tops, dinning room table. Cans every where! They are mostly dog food. To my surprise there were no cans in the cupboard.
     There so many things I remember from my childhood, from my visits with my grandparents, from that day. I am grateful. Which brings me to my point for today.
         Recently I was standing in my kitchen looking at the cans on my table, the counter tops, dinning room table, coffee table, even at the front door...thinking I have seen this "crime scene" before!
        MISS LOTTIE'S HOUSE!!!!! I have turned into Miss Lottie. The little old lady who chewed tobacco with all of those dogs. I hurried, at a break neck speed to put ALL of my groceries away! I had to put all of the clean dishes away. I put the clean Laundry away. Just because the dishes and laundry is clean, no one to "bother" me about putting things way, does not mean I shouldn't do it!
......Enjoying my life {Some days, you can call me Lottie}

THE GOLDEN GIRLS..

The Golden Girls….

I have enjoyed them for years. In the 1990’s I watched them on my days off just relaxing. Relating to Dorothy and her mom how they would “banter” back and forth reminding me of my mother and myself.  Rose and Blanche from two different schools of thought, background and upbringing. I got a laugh out of them navigating through retired life as single women. Wondering if I will have as much fun or have a similar outlook on life. I still enjoy them today. Especially when I found out they were in their 50’s!

What!!!!!

I am enjoying my life….

Who Knew!

I am a GOLDEN GURL!....

WHAT ABOUT A MARRIED DOMESTIC PARTNER?
I AM FROM A TRADITIONAL BACKGROUND WHO BELIEVES IN MARRIAGE BETWEEN ONE MAN AND ONE WOMAN. IF YOU TELL ME YOU ARE MARRIED, I WILL AUTOMATICALLY THINK MALE/FEMALE. IF YOU MIGHT SAY "MARRIED DOMESTIC PARTNER" I WOULD STOP AND WAIT FOR IT......{MALE/MALE; FEMALE/FEMALE; NON-MARRIED LIFE PARTNER} WITH THE SAME COMMITMENTS...{MY OPINION} YOUR WELCOME!

WHEN MY MOTHER PASSED AWAY....

                Let go,and let God;

Let the healing begin. God’s help is needed for “heal thyself”. God has a master plan, He makes no mistakes.

    “Give me strength and wisdom” to go through!

               Let go and let God

This a poem that I wrote when I was trying to heal.  I have given to some friends I hope you can add a few lines to this poem and pass it on.

                                    My Mother Left Me!

My mother left me with tools!

        Tools to use for life. Reading, writing, praying! Tools to have and appreciate what God has helped me to obtain. “ If you do not take care of what you have, you cannot appreciate the greater things to come”.

My mother left me with examples!

        Watching mother make meals out of little or nothing to feed my bothers and myself. Examples of how treat other people like I'd wanted to be treated.

        Watching my mother “ stand fast” with a “husband. Her husband; our father, someone I could not have stayed with, but she did!  I still do not understand-but no one has to understand, he was “her”  husband.

My mother left me with an ability to create a dispencer!

        To be able to dispense  love, wisdom, protection for my children and loved ones, at needed dosage, at needed times.

My mother left me with an engraved sense of self respect.

        “A good name is worth more than silver and gold”, was one of her lines.  To be clean and presentable at all times was taught at an early age. 

When I got older, I remembered "that you are some’s mother, daughter, wife, when you step out in public". “What would people think” was concern of hers. I didn’t care! But she did!, so I learned care!

        I am discovering every day new “stuff” my mother left me with.  Almeta finally let me use the things she left me on September 21, 2000 245AM.

        I pray that you will start discovering treasures that was left for you to use daily.

                                               RENEE EMILY

                   ADD TO THE LIST AND PASS IT ON!

PEACE IN YOUR LOVE ...

HOILIDAYS....

HOLIDAY MEMORY #112....ONE THANKSGIVING WHEN I WAS NEWLY MARRIED WE WENT TO SOME FRIENDS HOUSE FOR THANKSGIVING WERE THE TURKEY WAS COOKED IN A PAPER BAG...IT WAS INTERESTING. I DID NOT FIND OUT HOW IT TASTED BECAUSE THE "GIBLETS" WERE STILL INSIDE THE BAG, INSIDE THE TURKEY...(o_0).
HOLIDAY MEMORY #102....ONE YEAR I HAD TO WORK THE NIGHT BEFORE THANKSGIVING....I PUT A GOOSE IN THE OVEN, AFTER TWO DAYS OF MARINATING IN WINE TO BAKE...I LEFT INSTRUCTIONS FOR MY SONS TO TAKE IT OUT OF THE OVEN AFTER A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF TIME....WHEN I CAME HOME I FOUND A "ROAD-CARCASS" FOR AN ENTREE....THEY HAD STARTED TASTING AND DIDN'T STOP UNTIL THE GOOSE WAS "PICKED" CLEAN....I HAVEN'T COOKED GOOSE SINCE..(o_0)

AGING...

As I've aged, I've become kinder to myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend.

 

I have seen too many dear friends leave this world, too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.

 

Whose business is  it, if I choose to read, or play, on the computer, until 4 AM, or sleep until noon? I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 50, 60 &70's, and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love, I will.

 

I will walk the beach, in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the waves, with abandon, if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the jet set.

They, too, will get old.

 

I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten. And, I eventually remember the important things.

 

Sure, over the years, my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break, when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when somebody's beloved pet gets hit by a car? But, broken hearts are what give us strength, and understanding, and compassion. A heart never broken, is pristine, and sterile, and will never know the joy of being imperfect.

 

I  am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face. So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn silver.

 

As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don't question myself anymore. I've even earned the right to be wrong.

 

So, to answer your question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be. And I shall eat dessert every single day (if I feel like it).